Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Medical Blunders

According to researchers at the John Hopkins School of Medicine, fatal mistakes in hospitals and health care facilities are the third leading cause of death in the USA

The following are the five leading causes of death in the USA.

  • Heart Disease -- 614,348 deaths per year
  • Cancer -- 591,699 deaths per year
  • Medical Errors -- 251,454 deaths per year
  • Accidents -- 136,053 deaths per year
  • Stroke -- 133,103 deaths per year

More than 250,000 Americans die annually from medical mistakes and safety lapses. Perhaps the following examples of actual entries on hospital patient's medical charts could shed some light on this lapse of judgment.

·         Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

·         The patient refused autopsy.

·         Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

·         Skin: somewhat pale but present.

·         On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

·         Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

·         Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

·         Since she can’t get pregnant with her husband, I thought you might like to work her up.

·         The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

·         She is numb from her toes down.

·         Patient was alert and unresponsive.

·         While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

·         She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

·         Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

·         Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

·         The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

·         The patient has no previous history of suicides.

·         Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.

·         Patient’s medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

·         The skin was moist and dry.

·         Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

Medical professionals are only human -- they make mistakes just like the rest of us, plus there is also much tension involved in their work that often requires swift action.

May the Force be with you.

Quote for the Day -- “When we give government the power to make medical decisions for us, we in essence accept that the state owns our bodies.” Ron Paul

Bret Burquest is the author of 11 books. He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a few dogs and where humor relieves the stress of life.

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