Saturday, January 3, 2015

The Venting of a Psychologist

Many moons ago, I was blundering my way through life at Robbinsdale High School, in Robbinsdale, Minnesota, a suburb of Minneapolis. One of my best friends in those days, and subsequent years, was a fellow classmate who was also blundering his way through life.

After high school, I eventually graduated from college with a B.A. in Business and an M.S. in Management Information Systems. My old high school friend went on to get a PhD in Psychology and practiced his profession in the Minneapolis area for several decades until he retired a couple of years ago.

My old high school friend chose to remain in Minnesota, where mosquitoes flourish and winter temperatures are prefixed by a minus sign, whereas, I have roamed around the country, living at more than 50 addresses in 12 different states, trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life.

In any event, being a PhD Psychologist, my old high school friend has always been cool, calm and collected. However, recently various events in Washington DC had unfolded somehow causing my old high school friend to vent his frustration by sending me an e-mail containing a single paragraph, which reads as follows:

"I can give you something to work on to quell your boredom.  I have been listening to the wailing of liberals and have decided that there has been too much rancor in this bad country we live in.  Ergo, I am starting a petition to make Obama a king.  Also, to do away with that pesky constitution that has thwarted all of his good intentions to create a nirvana.  He can then dispense with congress so he doesn't have to deal with those mean republicans, and can simply make a speech and make an edict that will bring utopia to our land.  We won't need a military or police forces anymore, as who in their right mind would want to harm the citizens of the only utopia in the world, and who would even think about breaking the law when all of their wishes and wants will be supplied by government.  Also, government can take over all means of production so they can fix prices so no one will be making evil profit.  Also, he can tax the wealthy to 98%, and corporations (before the gov't takes over all production) to 94%.  As king of an utopia he will be respected by all of the world powers who won't want to hurt us utopians, therefore, we won't need a military to defend ourselves.  Think of all the money we will save and how much the king can give to poor people, and to the hordes of people in the world who will flock to this utopia.  I am making you my czar of the king petition, no need to discuss salary as all needs and want will be provided by King Obama and the utopian  system he wants us to live under, because he really cares about us.  Oh, one more thing, because he cares so very much, we should make him king for life so he can have the time to bring all of us under the control of his utopia."

Apparently, my old high school friend wants me to spearhead the effort to bring about the coronation of King Obama as ruler for life in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

Yes, I was very flattered to be considered for such an important assignment, but I wrote a swift note back to my old high school friend informing him that I was quite content to remain a hermit in the Land of Ark, where all the beautiful people live and time stands still.

I don't know if he went on to select a replacement to take my place -- I suspect he simply did a primal scream for a couple of minutes, then packed his gear to go fishing at his cabin in northern Minnesota.

Quote for the Day -- "My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you'll join with me as we try to change it." Barack Obama

Bret Burquest is the author of 10 books. He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a couple of dogs and has many intelligent friends in far off places.

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